Loving You, Before Somebody Else.

It always takes me a little while longer to write a more personal post than others. Not because I plan on writing War and Peace but a review on a primer doesn’t feel like you’re projecting yourself out there for the world to see you quite so much as talking about your personal love life. It’s February, the month of love and I debated for a while whether to acknowledge it at all but then, how can I not?

This time last year I wrote a post about being single on valentine’s day and about being single in you twenties, and how one should really learn to love themselves before attempting to love anyone first. This I still, and will probably always, stand by. How are you supposed to allow someone else to love parts of you, you don’t even know about? In the year since writing that I’ve learnt more about myself than I thought possible with so much more to go, I’m only 22 for God’s sake.

As a generation we seem to have become obsessed with the idea and expectation of love that there are only two extremes we seem to choose; we are either in constant relationships trying desperately to find ‘the one’ (whatever that means) or we are so afraid of rejection we close ourselves off to opportunities of happiness, even just fleeting. Quite frankly I don’t know which one’s worse. I’m trying to find the middle ground here, the part where you can learn who you are while learning parts of others too.

The fear of rejection will always be there if you’re not comfortable with who you are. And if you are, why the hell should it matter if someone can’t see how blooming great you are? There are unfortunately some that will never be able to appreciate a kind heart, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t have one. As long as you are striving to be the best possible version of yourself, does it matter if someone else can’t see that? If you’re waiting around for someone to magically discover you’ve been perfect all along, stop. There are 7.5 billion people in the world, I’m sure one of them will appreciate you.

I’m so grateful that my life is so full of love and that I can accept it. I’m sick of people accepting the love they think they deserve, because we all deserve 100% and nothing less.

-Lauren x

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